Kara's adult playground scam
Thank fuck my brother will take the kid until I can sit Kate down and explain this to her. In my hurry to get him out of the house, I put the car seat in my truck and I don't even know what I did to secure it. God the kid is fucking gorgeous if I do say so myself. I know I am on borrowed time and I need to get back and explain this to Kate. I pull the kid out of the car, car seat and all and carry him and the diaper bag to the front door where Sawyer is waiting for me. " Ana is holding up a folded note."No, no I didn't see it. I can't read it." I sit back down."The last time I saw you I was very angry at you for just barging in my life and trying to take Tristin from me. Kate knows you were a man-whore before so I don't know that she will be totally surprised Elliot but you two should have told us. But I am playing ball with him and Ana is sitting watching us. He seems happy with that."I want Dora." I look at Ana and put Tristin down at the bottom of the stairs. Of course he has Ana but she is so pregnant she doesn't need to be chasing some child around. Before Carrick can press the call button we here Sawyer's voice."I will be right down Mr. We have had some problems today with the Pap's trying to break through when the gate opens. Give me two minutes." We wait at the gate and the reporters are shouting."Dr. Elliot knows I was calling you guys but shouldn't you have this conversation with him. I was always careful until I got married." He looks sheepish. " Elliot looks down."My dad called CPS and they are on their way over.
I look over at the little blond mini me in his car seat. I know he isn't my kid because the DNA said otherwise, but he looks so much like me it is spooky. I know the fucker is trying not to laugh."Fuck you Sawyer. I look up and my very pregnant sister-in-law is glaring at me with her hands on her hip. At least I thought that is what you were trying to do. I know you were just trying to find out if you were the father, and I respect you for caring enough to track us down to find out. Thanks for taking him and I promise I will be back tomorrow night or at the latest …Monday. It makes me wonder what else you and Christian haven't shared."Oh not much. ""I want Mom to check him out and make sure this kid has been taken care of. He is standing about two feet from me and can't catch a ball for shit. He runs over to his diaper bag and pulls out a doll."You don't want that. The little dude is playing with a doll."Christian stop it. He clearly likes it." Ana is giving me shit about this."Fine, can play with it if he wants to but I can tell you who isn't playing with dolls someday." I look at her point to her belly and pull her chin up so she gets my full meaning."Christian be serious, he is a little boy.""Yea, okay well just remember this conversation. It might be a bit longer but as soon as we are done here we can head on over. He didn't say how old this child is and whose it is. I find Carrick and he is neither happy nor too willing to go to Christian's. We pull down the street and there are at least fifteen of those reporters hanging outside the gate. I am just the nanny service today.""Don't even play that game with me young man. I know you know the story here and I would bet you have known for some time. Sell that bullshit somewhere else kid."So that little boy in the other room is my grandson? No, for now I would say no.""Oh for fucks sake Christian. Don't play that fucking game with me." I slam my hand on his desk. Christian is furious with him because he doesn't want to see the little guy go into foster care or children's home tonight.
Just tell me what she said.""Fuck." Oh god I forgot mini-me was sitting back there."Don't say that word kid.""Chee-o's." What the fuck are Chee-o's? She abandoned her kid and just left him with a complete stranger. She probably doesn't take good care of him and I mean…you little shit put that back." While we were busy talking Tristin must have wondered off and is walking down the hall with a wine bottle he pulled from a rack."I am going home and going to have to tell Kate and then if she hasn't killed me we will come back and get him. " I don't care what they do with him at this point I just need to get home and sort this out. Okay I will call you after I talk to Kate…if you don't hear from me…..assume she fucking cut my nuts off and I can't move."I jump in the truck and head home….slowly. Pu ups." He shakes his head vehemently."What's he saying? What a scam.""Christian, follow me I don't know if I can lift him up to change him. When we get you changed, you can pet him if you do it gently." Glad she understands him. He zeros' in on his little dick and is pulling on it making me laugh. Ana keeps moving his hand to clean him up and he keeps putting his hand back on it. " Christian groans and rubs his face and I turn around and look at Carrick and his face is beet red and his temples on the side are protruding. He isn't speaking he just has his finger pointed towards Christian's office."Now Christian. He even has the little cleft in his chin just like Elliot…my god. Don't bull shit me Christian and do not cover for your brother.
And no fucking way am I going to be part of his life if he isn't mine. Christian puts his arm around Ana's shoulder and then shakes his head after thinking for a few seconds."What do you want to do here Elliot? What did you expect him to do, take off his shoes when he came in the front door, shake your hand and take out his brief case? " Ana burst out laughing."Come on Tristin, let's go change your diaper.""No diaper. So basically if he shits his pants it is no big deal he just gets to throw them away and get a new pull up or whatever they are called? Ana removes his shorts and asks me to hand her another pull up. They are fucking diapers without the tape on the side. " He is saying something."Yes he is waiting for you. He has white blond curly hair and is buried in Ana's lap. The child slowly turns around and looks at me with piercing blue eyes. Gosh Elliot's hair was white like that when he was that age. He reminds me of Elliot at that age doesn't he Carrick? He may have his Mom believing he is the fun loving easy going kid. I always knew that damn dick of his would get him in trouble."Who the fuck does that kid belong to?
That is why I had to get him the hell out of the house. Oh fucking please let me have one of those doppelgangers and have him be the one that fucked this kid's mom too. You probably have one of these running around out there too." He stops smiling. The kid is behind me on the floor still strapped to his car seat. I move out of the way and let Ana get her first peak. The kid is a fucking parrot not a human."What do you mean? Christian un-strap him and get him out of his seat." He gets him out and as I haven't seen him stand before I notice he is a stocky little guy. However, you didn't get back in touch so I assume you found out but decided not to contact me for whatever reason. I am not proud of this but it could be your baby or several other men. Lets' see we both fucked the same woman and she wants to fuck your husband while your recovering from having your baby and lets' see, there was that fucker we beat the snot out of and sent to Mexico and shit Itty Bitty don't even go there. Even if he isn't yours, I have a huge problem with the way she dumped him off Elliot. I want to check to make sure that he has been fed and well taken care of.""He clearly eats man. I wonder if anyone has ever played ball with the kid. Tristin, lets' go back out side and throw the ball to Benson. Leave Dorothy or whatever the fuck her name is here.""Fuck"Shit I have to quit saying that. He wanted to go clean the grill when we got home and watch the baseball game. So let's start with saving your ass first – start talking." He looks up at me. "Yes or no."We here the chimes and Sawyer comes to the door. He remembers what that is like, but my dad said it's not option.""Now I feel terrible. Maybe the baby bottle was just so nasty or something it didn't give a clean DNA.
If Kate had seen him without an explanation she would never believe me. Please god, I won't ask for anything else ever again. She literally rang the doorbell and said, 'you take him I can't do this anymore.' I looked down and he was in his car seat with a diaper bag and she ran off and jumped in a car driven by some guy. Christian comes to the door and acts like he is grabbing the diaper bag and whispers, "She is so fucking pissed that I never told her about this and that we did our own covert operation. She steps closer and her hand comes up to her mouth."Oh my god. Elliot…has to be your son."I sit down on the steps because I am about to pass out. God he has curly white-blond hair, blue as hell eyes, a fucking butt on his chin and I am freaking out. I have long thought he was yours as he looks so much like you. I am going away with a friend and will be back for him tomorrow night and then we can discuss how, if Tristin is your son, we can co-parent. You really don't want to know."There isn't anything else. And even thought you are really pregnant your still Itty Bitty and it is how I see you. I know he is little and all that but, this kid has no hand eye coordination. "Baby sit down for a little bit I will take him outside and we can throw the ball to Benson. I point to the playroom that is on the lower level. Fuck I hope he will be.""Well you have me curious now. If you think you do we can send someone to go and get it. I know he doesn't want o squeal on his brother but we're here now so he better start talking. "Sir, your brother is coming down the drive with Ms. Well she gave him to you; can't we just take him home? I don't know anything about that shit."Tuesday Afternoon Sunday night Kara returned and was hysterical when Elliot told her that Tristin was in Child Protective Services.
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He thinks Elliot and Christian haven't embraced adult hood so I hope this isn't something that is going to shock us, but with those two you never know.Just one fucking doppelganger."Hey, you doing okay buddy? She was out of there before I could even react."Chee-o's." I just smile. She just pointed out…if the baby bottle that we took that day was another kid's bottle."Oh fuck me. Ana steps closer and turns back around to look at me. The kid gets up and goes right for Benson and hits him on the back."Hey, little guy, gentle. He's doesn't like that." Christian is trying to be nice. Anyway, since you seemed so interested I took that as a sign you would want to be involved in his life. If he isn't your son, maybe we can find a way for you to be part of his life as he doesn't have a male role model. But thanks for not being too mad at me." She reaches over and kisses my cheek. Hopefully I will be back for him in an hour or so." Now isn't the time to tell her the other one hundred things Christian and I have sworn to secrecy."You better be back in an hour." Christian is following Tristin around as he takes shit off tables and throws it down. It's quite rude." Ana laughs and I head towards the door."Shit.""You two need to stop the cuss words he is repeating every bad word you say. Maybe I can teach this kid to throw the ball or something."Twenty minutes later I bring him in. I don't want to put him in Ted's crib but we have one of those pac and plays or play and pac or whatever it is called. I didn't even take the kid in there as we have thousands of dollars of toys and shit in there that I have been buying for Ted but most of it is in boxes still. I don't have my medical bag honey we have Dad's new car. Kavanagh.""About fucking time." Christian is sweating."Sawyer, please tell my son to march his ass right in this room when he gets in the door." I am so god damn mad at that kid. I should have told you but when we got the results and they came back that he wasn't mine…. everything going on with Mia…I just thought it was the last thing my parents needed.""El, I am going to be your wife. I thought we talked about this for two hours at home. I mean absofuckinglutely like you." Shit I am crying again. " He looks kind of sad too."No, my dad said if Tristin is mine it will make a better case if we legally report this for me to get shared custody or whatever. We aren't going to bring him home to live with us as he probably isn't even my kid. She called him every name in the book and started hitting him and throwing stuff. I finally get it more secure and head over to Christian's. God damn it."Tell Ana not to be mad at me, I am dying here. And she pretty much is asking for money either way." I can't blame Ana for being pissed at me. I appreciate your helping me out on this.""Just go Elliot. I know they will take care of him while I handle this. She has never been mad at me and I hate it."Itty Bitty don't be mad at me please and don't be mad at Christian. You know I was a bad boy before Kate and I regret that…well not all of it …but had I been more careful I wouldn't be even wondering about this. He was just being a good little bro and helping me out. Christian's POVHoly fuck this kid looks my brother. He has been here fifty minutes and destroyed the place. "Here Tristin for Pete's sake hold this." She hands him a book. She finishes cleaning him and pulling his pants back up and puts the diaper – excuse me the pull up in a small bag. He looks around and notices all the stuffed animals and toys. " Carrick mumbles its public record and ignores them. That's what they need to keep these sons of bitches away."Sawyer opens the gate and waves us through keeping the press out. Don't pass go, don't say another word." Oh my goodness Carrick is furious. I look at Ana; she looks down not looking in my eyes. If that isn't Elliot's offspring, he has a twin in this town. " I look at Ana and Christian who are just staring at me. How does that send a message that it isn't okay to shit in your pants? By the time our son is his age you will be an old pro." She smiles at me but I am completely out of my element here. I follow her and we take him upstairs to Ted's room and she tells me to lift him up and put him on the changing table. We follow Christian into the family room and I hear a little child crying. " Ana looks at Christian."Um, Mom and Dad this is Tristin. This is my mommy and daddy." Christian is being very sweet to this little boy whoever he is.Come on Tristin lets go and find a book to read." Ana takes his hand and leads him down the hallway to her office. He looks more like you than you do.""Christ I know it. I could tell he was getting tired and then he asked me to carry him. I walk into Sawyers office and motion for him to help me out. Ana said he won't really be going in there for the first six months or so anyway. "Pour me another Christian."We wait a few seconds and I hear Elliot tell Kate she can either wait for him to go see the child or go ahead. Oh Christ, she must have his balls in her hand right now. He must have dreaded telling her about this major oops."Thanks a lot fuck head for calling mom and dad.""I told you I wanted Tristin checked out and I was going to call Mom. Don't you think I have a right to know if I am a step mother? I don't know what else I can say.""Elliot I thought I was okay because you said the test indicated he isn't your son. Come on I need to go downstairs and give the cops a statement."Christian's POVMy parents didn't stay for dinner. I would have never called them if I thought they would have called CPS to take the little guy away. The police explained that both my parents as a physician and an attorney would have been in huge trouble when I tried to bribe my way into keeping him for the night. But ironically, once that bitch shows up again, she will be given her kid back like it was no big deal with a slap on the hands and probably told she has to take a parenting class. We are both quiet."Bro, sorry I got pissed at you when I came back. Kate was screaming at me all the way over and when I saw Dad's car, I knew my ass was grass. Kate was home and really let her have it and the scene was pretty ugly.